We touched on a sensitive issue this past Sunday. One that has touched many lives, and has hit both our communities in the distant and not so distant past. Our topic was the unfortunate reality of suicide and the United Methodist Church's stance on it.
I began with two passages from scripture that helped to inform our discussion. The first passage epitomizes how the Bible tends to deal with suicide and it was the account of Judas' suicide after betraying Jesus. In scripture the list of suicides is short, and every time the person who commits suicide is in no way judged or punished for having committed suicide. The second passage I lifted up came from Romans 8:38-39 and illustrated that nothing could separate us from the love of God in Christ.
I then turned to the United Methodist Book of Discipline and read the passage from it that discussed the issue of suicide (paragraph 161 N if you want to look it up). I pointed out that the passage emphasized the tragedy of the loss, but affirmed that we still are called not only to love those who attempt suicide, but also to love the families, friends, and loved ones of those who succeed in committing suicide. At this point I began to speak of the stigma that surrounds suicide and the reality that in our society when something makes us uncomfortable we just don't talk about it. I then stated that that is the last thing we want to be doing. As a community of faith we exist in part to support one another, and to help others to benefit from our collective wisdom. If we do not talk about, teach about, share about what we know about things like suicide then we will all be doomed to be ingnorant and missinformed about the subject.
To illustrate this point, I went through several commonly held beliefs about suicide, namely women commit suicide at a higher rate, teens are at highest risk of suicide, suicide rates are highest in the winter when the weather is bad, when a person is in the depths of depression they are at the highest risk of committing suicide, etc. All of these commonly held beliefs are wrong! Men commit suicide more than women (although women attempt suicide more than men), 65 and above is the highest group at risk of suicide (almost twice as much as teens), springtime has the highest suicide rate, it is when the person is "getting better" that they are more likely to commit suicide. Such examples and many many more lead us to collectively perpetuate ignorance and wrong beliefs about such topics, and yet we shy away from talking about them publicly. Many have since told me they've never heard a sermon about the topic of suicide. Hopefully our discussion on the topic Sunday will not be the last one held within our churches.
Finally I asked how many had been taught, or even believed that a person who commits suicide will go to hell. The results were split, but most had at least heard of the belief. I first pointed to scriptures non-judgmental stance on the issue. I reasoned that a person could not get the belief that suicide would send you to hell from the Bible. It's just not there. Then I gave the historical reason for why this teaching came to be. It began in the 5th century with Augustine, who in an attempt to curb the number of voluntary martyrs (people who volunteered themselves to be killed for their faith) declared that suicide would cause a person to go to hell, and therefore going to those persecuting Christians knowing that would put your life at risk would cause a person to go to hell. Finally I pointed to the passage in Romans and asserted that nothing, not even death at our own hands, can separate us from the love of God.
I would like to conclude with sharing that it is perfectly normal for most if not all people to have casual thoughts about suicide. If you find yourself thinking more seriously about suicide, please go to someone and talk with them. If you can't find anyone who you think has the time to talk, I do, and I'm always free to talk with anyone (you need not be a church member), feel free to call me, e-mail me, or show up at my door (although I'd prefer if you show up that it be a decent hour) ;).
Grace & Peace,
Pastor John
I am in the final semester of a masters degree in suicidology. My brother suicided 5 years ago next month. My study has helped me to understand my brothers death and also provided me with the skills to proactively address the tragedy of suicide and hopefully prevent other people from taking the path my brother chose.
ReplyDeleteWhen my brother died my mother was concerned that he would be denied the last rites, and would not be able to have a mass (family is roman catholic)nor a burial on consecrated ground. Fortunately things have changed in the past 100 yrs or so, and we no longer bury the suicide facedown at the crossroads with a stake through the heart... supposedly to prevent the suicide finding their way back to their home and haunting people. Disturbingly the last example of this was in the mid 1800's in England.
The priest was very supportive to my mother who needed it the most, as she had found him. Mark was buried above my father, after a proper mass where the reading was appropriately the one about there being many rooms in God's house.. (being a bit lapsed I dont remember chapter and verse).
I am very relieved that the Christian churches now realise the pastoral needs of those who lose a loved one to suicide and react with warmth and compassion, truly a Christian attitude.
My next statement is as a student and may not be so easily dealt with. Another suicide in the Bible is that of Samson, bringing the philistine palace down on his head and theirs. I think that the death of Jesus can be seen as an altruistic suicide, He knew He was going to die, He 'gave' his life for us. He did not crucify himself but he did have a choice, and chose to be put to death. Perhaps if the church were more open to this perspective then the suicide would not have been considered so evil, merely tragic